Sunday, September 30, 2012

Marie Schriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger

Maria Shriver in 1983 with her then boyfriend Arnold Schwarzenegger.  

 Well, we have all heard by now the latest news about Arnold Schwarzenegger.  Arnold admitted to having an affair with statuesque Brigitte Nielsen in 1985 while he was living with Maria Shriver.  Brigitte Nielsen wrote a book about her life and included her version of the affair with Arnold.  The affair started and ended while Arnold and Brigitte were filming the movie Red Sonja. 

 Brigitte Nielsen

"We both knew that when the film was finished, so were we," Nielsen writes. "Time was limited so we didn't hold back - we really made the most of it. The set lights would barely be off before we disappeared to do our thing. We wanted time to ourselves and we wanted to try everything. And when we were alone, that's exactly what we did."

Schwarzenegger says that having the affair with Nielsen made him realize how much he wanted to marry Maria.  I don't quite get how having an affair with another person makes you want to marry the person you are actually supposed to be in a committed relationship with, but people who cheat do tend to have the most distorted notions.

Here are more photos of Arnold and Maria in the early years of their relationship.  They certainly look happy.  Arnold looks pleased and very happy to be with Maria.  I would also have to assume that since Arnold was with Maria for so many years prior to them marrying that Maria must have been very pleasing to him all along.  I am not just talking about in the bedroom either.  Maria must have pleased Arnold in every way since she was his main squeeze for so long. As you can see Maria Shriver was also definitely a cutie.  I would even say that she was absolutely gorgeous.  Not that being good looking is the be all and end all of choosing a wife.  Choosing a spouse solely on looks is very foolish and many people have made huge errors in marrying solely because the person was great eye candy.

Since Schwarzenegger is still trying to get his wife back I think it is safe to assume that he has always been pleased with her.  Therefore the question is why did he not cherish her and their relationship enough to respect her and the vows he took when he married her.  This is an age old question that has never received a response that made sense.  It simply does not add up that if you truly love someone and see yourself being with them for the rest of your life that you also would go off and engage in sex with another. 

Fifteen years ago Schwarzenegger fathered a child with their then housekeeper.  So not only did Arnold cheat on Maria while they were living together, but he also cheated after they were married.  This would make people wonder if there are other women that he had sex with while he was with Maria.  If the public is wondering about that, then I am sure that Maria has wondered about it many times.  As a woman who believes in true love I understand why Maria felt that she had to leave her husband.  What Arnold did makes their entire relationship seem like a farce from the beginning.  When you love someone and you intimately come together with that person in a physical way, you are sharing something very special.  To know that your beloved came together intimately with another, even if it was not about love, destroys all that was between the two of you.  People who cheat refuse to understand that.  Even if Maria had never found out about the affairs, Arnold still made a farce of his relationship with the person he claims to love and wants to spend the rest of his life with. 

This is what Arnold Schwarzenegger risked losing every time he cheated on his wife.  

The still lovely Maria Shriver is now left to pick up the pieces of her life and try to make sense of all the years that she spent with Arnold.  Their four children also have to live with the fact that their father cheated on their mother for so many years.  That must be so embarrassing for them.

What makes this even more horrible is that this is a public scandal.  It is difficult enough to deal with a cheating spouse when no one in the public knows you.  When you are in the public eye for whatever reason it is a public humiliation.  I wonder if Arnold has any idea just how deep the implications of his actions really are.

No one can decide for Maria if she should take Arnold back.  That is something that requires time and soul searching.  I do believe that it is important for Maria to forgive Arnold though.  That may seem incredible and even crazy to some people, but not to me.  I think that forgiveness is always important when a person hurts you.  It is okay if you need to take time to do it, but you must do it for yourself, so that you can move on and truly be free.

I don't know if I would take Arnold back if I was in Maria's shoes; probably not.  Not under those circumstances.  If I found out that my husband was cheating throughout our entire relationship everything would change for me; including how I feel about him.  I think that over time I could forgive him and even let go of any bitterness to wish him well, but I would not see him as my beloved ever again.  That would be destroyed.  It would take a heaven sent miracle for feelings like that to ever return.  The most I could manage is being friends and thankful to him for the children we had together.



Sixpence and A Blue Moon said...

Just goes to show that having all the material possessions in the world can't make us content. He is one man that seemed to have it ALL...and still was not happy.

True happiness only comes from within.

Thanks so much for stopping by my blog.

collarcitybrownstone said...

Of course I don't know Mr. Schwarzenegger, but I am not sure that he cheated because he was not content at home or with his material possessions. There are men who cheat simply because they want to. If they encounter a woman that turns them on they have no problems acting on it. I once read an article that interviewed men who did not have any intentions on being faithful husbands right from the start. One man admitted to having his first extra-marital encounter right after he and his wife returned from their honeymoon and had many sexual encounters since then. He was married for several years and his wife did not have a clue about his affairs. He did not feel guilty and had no intentions on becoming a faithful husband. Human beings have really sunk low.